HOMOVISION.TV » clubbing

VIDEO: GUTTERSLUT BIRTHDAY TWO

Simon McD — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 10:53:39 +0000

Gutterslut – the EastEnder’s benders and friends fancy dress shack – is whoop-whooping their second birthday this Saturday at the glamourous Rhythm Factory on Whitechapel Road.

Party people include Miss Jonny Woo, Larry T and Per QX, Elliot J Brown and Princess Julie to name but a few.

We like a bit of Gutterslut. There’s plenty of dirty disco boys who, although keeping their shirts on the dancefloor, still know how to work it when they take them off back in the bedroom. Apparently. And that kind of scruffy gym fag-smoking beer-swigging trucker look really does it for us. And they have no shame in wearing high-heels – you won’t get that down at Supermarketmatinee unless they’re truefem or fembots or both at the same time. And of course, there you can’t talk to a man in high heels as people will think you’re gay. Which you are, of course. But that’s the game we play.

And breathe.

Here’s a video. Check it out fag friends…

DISCO HEALTH CLUB

HOMOVISION — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 07:22:51 +0000

Think Jane Fonda, think TV-AM’s Mad Lizzie, think kids from Fame. Think Disco Health Club at Soho’s Green Carnation every Wednesday. After work. Protein shakes at the bar. Work it baby.

Night begins with disco aerobics classes with an expert instructor, followed by discoshaping later on. Changing facilities also to squeeze into your spanglex.

There’s a video over the jump…

HOMOVISION REHAB with THE SWARMITE: EXPECTATIONS

Swarmite Parker — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 11:28:41 +0000

Setting expectations too high is societies curse, which is why government and partners fail us and media is flooded at this time of year with detox trivia, diet plans and resolutions. Don’t encourage them, be stylish – wait till February or when you feel you want to, rather than need to just because it’s New Year. January is the time for looking back, not unplanned impulsive action. Take note of Dickens little orphan boy Pip in Great Expectations, “take nothing on it’s looks; take everything on evidence : there’s no better rule”.

It’s a pity that gayers take many things on it’s looks – first glance, an image, a dealer or dress code often without resort to reality, living in a dream like space. It’s easy to be optimistic in a club then discover 6 weeks later knee deep in “a relationship” that he’s psychotic, a compulsive liar or an addict. It pays to do detail sooner. Although the Pythons insisted that we look on the bright side of life, optimism is another word for DENIAL so best if you face facts quickly, take everything on evidence and move on. Though it must be noted that denial is an unconscious defence mechanism necessary for survival, which is why it’s so rampant.

None of us can survive our lives without a certain amount of denial to keep us in balance, but with denial in regards to addiction, the denial is taken to extreme and since gayers have a habit of breaking conventional bounderies, we are more prone to addiction, because we often have no boundary of when to stop. We don’t want the party to end, the unconscious spending to end, the cruising to end and the chems to end but if we don’t take stock, look back over the year, the end will come sooner than expected.

Why do people deny they need help? There are many reasons for denial in addiction. One reason is that generally people do not like to feel helpless and out of control and ironically, to observers, this is exactly what addicts are feeling. Bob Mandel of the Loving Relationship Training said ” the only guru you need are the results in your life “, but any addict or compulsive user often refuses to face facts, relying instead on the expectation that it will all end with a wave of a magic wand. It won’t. The addict will blame everything and everyone except their own substance abuse for their problems. Another reason is that the addict may be using drugs or alcohol to cover up numb or unpleasant feelings and by stripping away the denial, the unpleasant feelings will come to the surface, one of the reason why chems are the lifeboat of the scene.

The last two weeks for gayers will have sorted the men from the boys, top this with office parties and extra socialising in December it’s no wonder we crave a detox, a rest or show the white flag for the New Year. It’s expected now that we slow down and the majority will, but many will be living with a nightmare partner, flatmate or family member with the party still in full swing. If you are – seek help. You may not help the addict but you can stop yourself getting drawn into manipulated guilts, codependency and the false expectation they will wake up and come out of their coma of justification.

While not all substance abusers have suffered past traumas in their lives, an inordinate amount have, child, sexual & physical abuse is common in the addicted population. For gayers add secrets, withheld emotions, homophobia and shame to the mix. But, no matter what the cause is of the denial, the important part is that the addict ( or anyone close to the addictive person ) confront the defense mechanism head on. This may be by what some addicts describe as “hitting bottom” or can come from confrontation with family, friends or through the court systems like possession or drunk driving.

Many times an addict will lose a job, friends or family relationships because of the addiction but still find enablers to supply. Denial in addiction is not a linear course, either. The addict may be in denial at some times, and facing reality at others, so addiction in denial may be fluid especially in the beginning stages of looking at themselves or in recovery. Even for those who are far along the recovery path, falling off the wagon and denial can strike at any time and will need to be overcome once again to get back on track. Perhaps Linkin Park talked about confronting denial best in their song “Breaking the Habit” when they said, “I’ll paint it on the walls, ’cause I’m the one at fault” in acknowledgement that a habit is indeed a personal disease for which one needs to take responsibility in order to break free.

More people consider REHAB in January than at any other time of year but the real test of whether you are in an addictive compulsive spiral is to stop and see how far you get without your poison be it alcohol, chems, escorts, food, internet or procrastination. Expect nothing and allow yourself to feel anything, even a feeling of surrender and freedom. Bare in mind that there are more compulsive dependents than addicts, but addiction will always grab you by the balls when it goes unobserved – ask a crack head or meth abuser. Best if you observe now, take stock, tell the truth to someone and seek help in the areas that control you. It’s not about stopping the party it’s about knowing when to leave. Look at your life, check the evidence, own it and then decide what needs changing. Don’t expect someone else to do it for you.

More support services can be found at http://www.theswarmite.com/urban-addictions
Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous have regular LGBT meetings in London – check Google for more information.

THAT WAS 2009…

HOMOVISION — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 13:07:00 +0000

Two thousand and nine. Bit of a blip really. Anyway, here’s our video highlights of 2009:

DJ Oliver M
DJ and Matinee promoter Oliver M talks about the state of London gay clubland. We like a bit of Oliver M. He dared to take the leap out of the Vauxhall triangle when everyone else was saying it wouldn’t work, and we’re liking his clubland passion.

http://www.homovision.tv/interview-oliver-m-drugs-and-gay-clubland/

Scottee: Buy a better you
Scottee Scottee. Twisted club performer and singer extraordinaire. Here’s an interview about his first one-woman show at London’s Soho Revue Bar. We were impressed with his voice. No lip-synching and a good set of lungs. Top marks.

http://www.homovision.tv/interview-scottee-scottee-scottee-scottee/

Emmanuel Ray at London Fashion Week
Face of Fashion Emmanuel Ray heads to London Alternative Fashion week where he himself got more attention than most of the models with his three meter feather hat.

http://www.homovision.tv/alternative-london-fashion-week/

Blue Blake Porn director
Gay sex, poppers, New York, New York, New York. Porn director Blue Blake talks about his life down the porn-o-mat.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-blue-blake-porn-director/

Jodie Harsh
Kasheik Paisley interviews drag addict Jodie Harsh at her London flatette. Unfortunately most of it was cluttered with wigs and cigs. She never gets back to us. That’s because she’s famouser. Innit.

http://www.homovision.tv/jodie-harsh-interview/

Jeannie Dee Coming Out:
Former trucker, now DJ Jeannie Dee talks about her life as a transvansexual for our Coming Out videos. It all started when he was having a slash in a motorway layby and a tranny popped out of the bushes. You couldn’t make it up.

http://www.homovision.tv/coming-jeannie-dee/

Coming Out Stories:
For London Pride 2009 we headed down town to find out your coming out stories. One of the most inspiring was a lesbian called Orla and her story…

http://www.homovision.tv/tag/coming-out/

Paul Burston and Christian Fundamentalists
So we were waiting at City Hall for Peter Tatchell to turn up for an interview, when we bumped into Paul Burston. When the Christian fundamentalists turned up, Burston goes mentalistic. You can take the man out of Wales, but you can’t take Wales out of the man.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-fundamentalists-mayors-pride-reception/

Boris Johnson’s blurred Pride Speech:
So we went to City Hall for the pre-Pride party for London Gaying organisations. In a year when homophobic hate crimes were on the increase in the city, we couldn’t believe our ears when we heard Mayor Boris Johnson’s bumbl-o-maticing speech, which would have been great for a comedy club. Unfortunately for us, and you, it sounded like a half-arsed attempt to say something vaguely inspirational. But in Latin backwards. Nice chianti and dips though.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-boris-pride-speech-2009/

Debbie McGee at Franks Closet
Superstar Debbie McGee and the Franks Closet cast talk about the show. We loved a bit of Franks Closet. Camp-o-rama with plenty of balls.
http://www.homovision.tv/video-franks-closet-debbie-mcgee/

Men at Play relaunch
Suits and totty site Men at Play relaunch with a tops of tits out party at London’s grittering Cafe de Paris. Here’s the show. Backwards.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-men-play-relaunch/

East End attacks
Jeannie Dee superstar DJ was DJing at The George in London’s fashionablahblah Shoreditch when a gang of Bengali youths tried to storm the place. Smokers outside were punched, while others tried to get inside. The gaypers report nothing.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-east-gay-attacks/

Public Meeting for East End Homophobia
In response to the reports about East End Homophobia, the police and Tower Hamlets Council host a public meeting to discuss attacks in the East End.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-east-homophobia-public-meeting/

Stewart Who
DJ and writer, Stewart Who? releases D-d-d-d-disco with DJ Pagano. Here he talks about the London gay scene, drugs and clubs. Who?s always got a good story. Nice cuppateanno’s too.

http://www.homovision.tv/stewart-who-back-to-the-future/

TRAVEL: Kokerboom Forest
The love story of Namibia’s Kokerboom Forest featuring scene superstar London Ibis.

http://www.homovision.tv/homotravel-kokerboom-forest/

Hate Crime
Ian Baynham gets murdered in Trafalgar Square as he gets off a bus. Police look for a man and two girls. A facebook group organised by Mark Healey attempts to gather people in Trafalgar Square to support a vigil against hate crime. We headed to Soho to find out people’s views. We were disappointed to find that the vast majority of gayers didn’t even know anyone had actually been killed. A depressing day.

http://www.homovision.tv/hate-crime/

Hate Crime Vigil
The London Hate Crime Vigil fills Trafalgar Square with gayers and their friends to stand against all forms of hate crime…

http://www.homovision.tv/video-london-hate-crime-vigil/

Qboy
Kasheik Paisley interviews gay rapper boy Qboy in NYC

http://www.homovision.tv/video-qboy-interview/

GMFA and HIV Prevention
Following a series of articles by Gary Leigh which criticises the state of HIV prevention in the UK, GMFA’s Matthew Hodson speaks to HOMOVISION about the work of GMFA and AIDS prevention strategies in the UK.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-gmfas-matthew-hodson-hiv-prevention/

DJ Nathan6
DJ Nathan6 talks to HOMOVISION about clubs, clubbing and the London scene. We like the 6. Anyone who talks about Brenda from Xfactor and progressive house in one sentence can catch our bus.

http://www.homovision.tv/video-dj-nathan6/

AND THAT WAS HOMOVISION 2009….
Thanks to everyone who’s been involved. You know who you are. You kept it going.
To everyone else…
KEEP.FUCKING.WATCHING!

OWN SOME GAY CLUBBING HISTORY: DTPM, TRADE, QUEER NATION, FLESH…

Simon McD — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 13:41:28 +0000

Art associated with clubs such as DTPM, Queer Nation, High on Hope, Trade and Flesh (Hacienda) recently featured in a series of exhibitions in London, Tokyo and Shanghai in 2009. The Our History show included photography, film, art, canvases, prints, and original material covering the clubbing from five decades and three continents. They are the clubs that broke the mould and set the tone for new era of clubbing. Now the exhibition is in London. Here’s a video:

These iconic images are now for sale. They’re signed by the artists, and a part of a numbered, limited edition of 50 framed, A2 prints with an “Our History” embossed stamp.

Here’s the list of works:

Graphic Art
Alan Macdonald & Patrick Lilley – Queer Nation
Martin Brown Trade – DTPM
Trevor Johnson – Flesh
Patrick Lilley – High on Hope
Jamie Reid – Back To Basics
and many more.

Photography
Paul Hartnett
Richard Braine
Gavin Watson
Paul Massey
Janette Beckman
Ted Polhemus

10th – 31st December 2009
Austin Gallery
119a Bethnal Green Road
London
E2 7DG
0207 613 0185

Matinee Raising Money for Elton John Aids Foundation (homovision.tv)
Abba World at Earls Court (homovision.tv)
Video: Supermartxioeriusxyuiwye Celebrates 1st Birthday (homovision.tv)
Kinky Trade Returns @ Renaissance Rooms (homovision.tv)

HOMOVISION REHAB with THE SWARMITE: XMAS BOOZE CHECK

Swarmite Parker — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 22:56:44 +0000

We know that Alcohol can make gayers do mad things but no one is mental enough to give up Booze before Christmas. Right? “It’s only another month before the New Year and I can get it sorted then” is the annual December mantra of hope. The page BOOZE CHECK on my own website is number 1 on Google if you tap it in, my most popular hit. Funny that, as we are led to believe by government and media that drug cartels are the greatest threat to civilisation when alcohol, the oldest known drug remains a coffer filler in taxes.

Don’t upset the horses. This brings us neatly to heroin chic and horse tranquilliser, contenders for regular off yer face activities. HEROIN for GAYERS? surely not, that’s so skag estate 1986, so dilly boy in the ’70s, well it’s all fashion retro now, visit any Narcotics Anonymous meeting in London or ANTIDOTE , the Soho LGBT substance misuse support service and you will find gay smack heads, recovering K-holers and the like. In the rush to find something higher and higher the old standby of dutch courage – BOOZE – is forgotten in the stampede.

Just because I don’t drink anymore doesn’t mean I am anti booze like a member of The Temperance Society, the problem as I found out, is not the booze or substance but the vessel it goes in and my vessel was as flooded as the Lake District . I remember someone saying “I drank to drown my problems then my problems learnt to swim”. Right. I needed help but couldn’t reach for the phone. Gayers who are alcoholics are in the minority compared to a majority who say they ” drink too much “. There is a difference, a fine line, and no one can tell you where it is, but if alcohol is costing you more than money then it makes sense to booze check.

Using December as a month to start is unrealistic as excuses abound, justifications made and duty calls. You may as well do yourself a service and get pissed till you’re ready to surrender the game and see what’s it’s like WITHOUT BOOZE in the New Year. Using alcohol to function as a remedy for social phobia is easy compared to tapping yer fingers in a dry period to prove you can live without it. People have such misconceptions of alcohol abuse, binge drinkers are the worst when it comes to porkies, lying to yourself that you don’t need it, “I’m not a daily drinker etc” is futile excuse compared to the things you do to prove the point. Just like some Class A Muscle Mary’s who don’t flinch at the dealers running costs or escorts bill of fare, who binge weekends and drink wheat grass juice in the week for detox, using gym workouts to prove they are on top to stay in the game of approval seeking. Excess can become normalised, losing the plot along the way with a chem-ed up body clock. Our bodies used to tell us when to stop, now the ego says stopping means missing out, then we moan that rejection is our own worst fear and reject the consequences of using. I have done it myself.

Office parties, group meet-ups, Shoreditch House invites, marathon clubbing weekends and being sick on the tube is all part of the vehicle called Xmas, but I have not yet scored 100 points this season witnessing sick on both inside double tube doors. The Great Escape. They never made it. No one is suggesting you adhere to the healthy units limit ( unless you’re driving ) the Government lays out, that’s gone at Happy Hour in Barcode, but it’s wise to EAT before you lash out in Soho and beyond. Have a great time and have a drink on me. You’re paying.

But some people are dreading the party season, let’s concentrate on two types. The first are the ones socially phobic, permanently shy and awkward in company and the second type could be connected to the first but is likely to worry someone just the same – the partner, boyfriend or best m8. For this group someone who changes personality or becomes abusive when drunk is nerve racking. Their Xmas is buggered before they start pulling crackers. Some are dreading going home for Xmas to face the drunken Mum or abusive Father or even worse – a drug free Christmas. Coming from a family damaged by alcohol breeds codependency and excuses, it also breeds silence when it comes to explaining London life in Vauxhall. Yes Xmas is difficult but good preparation ahead of the game can avoid worst fears. Christmas IS the most codependent time of the year and next week as the Virgin Timetable draws closer I shall focus on the coda pitfalls of going home. If you partner someone with a drinking problem, share what’s going on with friends, don’t enable the drinker and stop nagging. Make sure you have a Xmas too and avoid babysitting, heavy drinkers are amazingly resilient.

After New Year some of you may want to dry out a bit or consider purposeful using of alcohol and chems. Many support services are free and remember that paid for therapy costs no more than what you spend willy-nilly on booze and other distractions. If you have a drug or Alcohol issue maybe these guys can help in Soho : http://www.thehungerford.org/antidote.asp or check-in to The SwarmiteREHAB Booze Check Page : http://tinyurl.com/mckg6b for a New Year lifestyle makeover.

VIDEO: GMFA’S MATTHEW HODSON ON HIV PREVENTION

Simon McD — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 20:02:11 +0000

Matthew Hodson, Head of Programmes at gay men’s health charity GMFA, has spoken to HOMOVISION.TV about the recent criticisms of HIV health campaigns as well as the work and aims of the charity, their policy on bareback porn and the effect the internet and sex-clubs have on HIV prevention.

Hodson says that the main aim of GMFA is to provide clear, honest, accurate and accessible information, and stresses the need for a balanced approach towards HIV prevention: “There isn’t one campaign, one booklet or piece of group work that will work equally with everyone,” he says. “We strive to give gay men information. The work we do works to empower gay men. We look at those issues like self-esteem and we do that with counseling, group work or mentoring. If gay men have the information, the ability and the resources for safer sex – that’s what we are striving for.”

In the interview, he also questions the results of the Soho Live Survey – featured in Gary Leigh’s article on HOMOVISION – stating that such research may simplify HIV prevention campaigns: “I think the problem with some of the criticism recently, is blame culture. I think this is the main problem with Gary’s research – it was asking people who’s to blame – and people could say it’s bareback porn, or the failure of HIV prevention agencies. But actually when people have unprotected sex, it’s not just because they saw a bareback porn film, it’s a whole range of different influences that go into that decision. That will be what their understanding of HIV is, what their understanding of HIV transmission is, how they feel about themselves, self-esteem, what they think their partner’s status is etc. These are really complex things. I think the problem with Gary’s survey is that it tried to make it really simple, and say there’s one reason why people are having unprotected sex, and I don’t think that relates to people’s experience.”

According to Hodson, most gay men now meet their first sexual partner online, which has lead to new challenges in the ways HIV prevention campaigns are developed: “Sixty percent of gay men meet their sexual partners on online dating websites. It’s the most significant place for people to meet. Ten years ago people were more likely to meet in cottages or cruising grounds,” he says. “There’s a real change in the way gay men organise their sex lives now, and this is something that HIV prevention agencies need to work with.”

Hodson is also admits that some advertisements for sex clubs in gay magazines are questionable: “I don’t think it’s up to me to say to a magazine who they should accept advertisements or not. I couldn’t name the club, but sometimes I have flicked through a magazine and seen an advert for a club and been quite shocked by the way its depicted because I think there’s a lot that does suggest that there’s sometimes quite hardcore and potentially dangerous activity.”

He adds: “I don’t think it’s damaging the work of GMFA, but I do think there are some things that make HIV prevention activity harder. But this is the environment we have to work in, and that’s why it’s really important that we put out our messages which are clear, unambiguous and honest.”

As to the future, Hodson admits that HIV prevention campaigns must be relevant: “There’s always new people to the scene and you’ve got to get information out to them,” he says. “We’ve got to look at new ways of using the Internet, which is a large part in which gay men organise their sex lives. And it is also about saying ‘We’ve got to take responsibility for our own behaviour’. I also think there’s new challenges which are presented by the fact that treatments are improving because it isn’t the death sentence it was 15 years ago and I think there is a real challenge because we can’t say “Don’t catch AIDS because you will die” because we’ve seen deaths drop by 80%.”

WATCH THE FULL INTERVIEW HERE

HOMOVISION REHAB with THE SWARMITE: VIRUS LIVING

Swarmite Parker — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 13:06:18 +0000

In the current PC climate of rising HIV infections, when health charities place the sensibilties of poz people above prevention, many say we need to go back to basics. When this gay plague started I was there, being tested at The Royal Free Hospital in Hampstead in 1981. Doctors had flown from America because a mysterious virus had turned up in major American cities in gay men who were also chronic Hepatitis B Virus. I had recently been told that I had Cirrhosis of the Liver caused by the hep virus living in my body undetected for a decade. I was a Hep B super-carrier with an immune system unable to create the antibodies to fight the virus. I stopped drinking alcohol, dealing with my addiction to booze and drugs but my liver got worse and I continued to self-infect myself with Hepatitis B until 1996 when I cleared the virus through yogic breathwork and thousands spent on therapy, retreats and alternative approaches.

I was one of ten on the first human interferon drug trial in 1982 – there was, and there still is no cure, and I received no further medication except to manage liver failure. Everyone died on the trial except me. All gay men under the guidance of The Royal Free and St Mary’s in Paddington were tested by American doctors, hair, blood, saliva and semen, to see if we had the mysterious virus called GRID.

Gay Related Immune Deficiency.

In 1984 French & American Researchers came up with the same conclusion and called it the HIV Virus. I did not have the HIV virus and remain negative today – having survived one virus, why create another? Reading through the following quotes you will notice that nothing much has changed in 25 years. The only unspoken thread is that millions and millions of ££££’s are thrown at the AIDS Industry for 80,000 people in the UK when hardly anything is available from the Government for the University of Southhampton’s figure of 450,000 people in the UK living & dying with Hep C.

Poz gay guys who prefer to BB run a risk of becoming infected with Hep C as well as other STD’s, and the figures for gay men are rising.
Health Agencies insist ” HIV is a manageable disease with a few pills each day “. It isn’t. This is as much a scandal as those 450,000 Hep C carriers in the UK and 326,000 infected with Hep B in the UK who are left to wander in the wilderness without a day to rattle tins or gain support services. Worldwide more than 350 million people have chronic or lifelong Hepatitis B infections.

Centers For Disease Control, Atlanta, USA. 1984
“Four days later, researchers from the Pasteur Institute provided Don Francis with convincing proof that their virus, LAV, caused AIDS. In October, Francis had sent the French Scientists 30 blood samples, including 10 from the San Francisco Hepatitis B cohort of gay men who had developed AIDS, 10 from gay men with lymphadenopathy, and 10 from heterosexuals not at risk for AIDS. The samples were sent blind, marked only with code numbers. The French researchers reported to Don Francis their results : positive LAV antibody tests in 20 of the samples and negative tests in 10. Francis quickly paged through his notes to compare the code numbers. The French had accurately sorted the blood of AIDS and lymphadenopathy patients from the blood of uninfected people. Francis was elated. With the cause of AIDS found, scientists could now get on with the business of controlling the spread of the epidemic and finding a vaccine.” – AND THE BAND PLAYED ON / Randy Shilts

New York 1989
“First, I’d always been a little crazy, not clinically, just over-intense, compulsive, prone to a variety of erotic addictions and narcissistic mood swings – euphoria to despair in 3 seconds flat. Second, the backdrop of my breakdown – New York in the Eighties – was insane in itself. Third and most important, I was plugged into the epicenter of that insanity, working for Andy Warhol. the grand vizier of meaninglessness, and the most famous artist in the world. In the three years since I started working there, Andy had come to symbolize everything that was wrong with the world : hype and cleverness without soul, a Technicolor surface without depth, a glittering facade fashioned from fame, name and money; an inverted place where everything and everyone is reduced to an object and put on sale, where everyone has his fifteen minutes, where the serious is boring, the fluffy fabulous and behind this great mask of glamour and image, an abyss. It wasn’t always like this. For a long time, this world thrilled me. With every hoop my bosses held up, I jumped higher. New York was the big game and I adored it. I scheduled an appointment for the HIV test on March 30 1989. I was casual about it with friends, who warned me of my usual bravado” – SEX, DEATH, ENLIGHTENMENT / Mark Matousek

New York City 1994
“Even during the most repressive years of the AIDS crisis, a vibrant sexual playground survived in secret. The streets grew cold and scant, the neighbourhood bars thinned out, but if you knew the right someone you got taken to a place behind locked doors. Most gay men knew the right someone. The generation of gay men who have come of age in the era of AIDS are as fervent in desire as their disappearing Stonewall predecessors. In New York the night before the June 1994 Gay Pride Parade celebrating 25 years of gay liberation, the lineup of clean-cut, all -American men for a popular sex club stretched five blocks down the West Side Highway. The truth is that gay men like to have communal sex – or, as it’s called in the vulgate, orgies. Communal sex is to gay men what golf is to, well, other kinds of men: they find beauty and bonding in it. It defines the individual as part of a collective. By definition – because that is how history and social forces have conspired – “gay” is the construction of identity through sexual relations. The origin of the modern gay community arose in the simple act of two men picking each other up” – THE CRISIS OF DESIRE : AIDS AND THE FATE OF GAY BROTHERHOOD / Robin Hardy

London does not have anywhere to remember those brave souls who were struck down with AIDS. We are told that no-one dies of AIDS anymore, cancer, as example, has always reassured the family on a death certificate. If no shame exists around HIV/AIDS why not proudly proclaim on the Death Certificate: Cause of Death: Aids Related Infection.

Londoners have never dealt with the critical mass of collective grief over Aids, we have nowhere to ponder on the friends we lost, a space to leave notes, flowers and acknowledgement. Gary Henshaw of KU Bar and myself have started a Facebook group today to correct this error, aiming to create such a space for WORLD PRIDE LONDON 2012. Please join our group:

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=180686542643&ref=nf

COMMENT: FAME, SCENE CELEBRITIES AND THE FUTURE OF GAY CULTURE

Alex Hopkins — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 06:17:45 +0000

Apparently X Factor 2009 ends on 12th December. I say ‘apparently’ because loathing the superficial trite-fest as I do, I had to Google the date. Personally, I could not care less, yet this auspicious landmark is sure to be engraved on many a London scene queen’s mind.

It will represent the end of countless Saturday nights spent in G.A.Y. bar screaming and squirming in excruciating delight as one naive, fame hungry hopeful after another suffers at the hands of the deliciously camp Simon Cowell.

As tawdry and superficial as the show may be it represents a highly potent bland of escapism. I don’t have a problem with escapism per se – it is one of the few safeguards of our sanity. My issue is that the show, like all reality television, exults and promotes the quick fix theory of fame.

Its promise of instant gratification and maximum output with minimal input symbolises all that is bad about society – it is also a mindset that has, sadly, been internalised by many young gay people today.

The gay counterpart of the X Factor quick fame fix is the endless list of gay club promoters, DJs and ‘scene celebrities’ we are inundated with today. Their existences are based solely on courting the kind of idolisation that an X Factor winner so fiercely covets. Being seen is all the matters, attracting notoriety is their primary motivation and conspicuous consumption is their modus operandi. Where though, exactly, is their body of work?

Since when did prancing around the entrance to Fire in some gaudy frock or lip synching to some techno remix by a twenty something in a baseball cap constitute hard graft? Is standing on a club door clad in garish knickers with lumps of K dangling from your nostrils either creative or groundbreaking? I think not.

The sad fact is that these individuals are held up as role models for gay people today. They have nothing to say about gay culture apart from highlighting the frivolity and fragility of appearances. Even still, the gay press are quite happy to waste pages on non entities trading in other people’s recycled ideas and passing themselves off as ‘legendary’ while marginalising someone with even a modicum of real talent.

What hope is there for the future of a valid, respected gay culture if individuals who really do have something new and inventive to say are not given the exposure that they deserve? What chance do our upcoming artists, writers and performers have if they are not given the coverage they merit? They are left floundering in a few column inches below the glitter, schmaltz and frankly questionable mentality of some floozie in suspenders with the audacity to claim they are a revolutionary gender bending ‘scene star.’

We have a rich and varied gay heritage – something that needs to be celebrated and built upon. It should be a source of real pride for us, something that we can hold up as a model of solid achievement to the straight world. Yet unless we actually begin to focus on this and foster and encourage real talent this will be forgotten.

Like X Factor, our ‘scene celebrities’ peddling their deluded concept of fame offer us an innocuous and amusing diversion. There will always be a place for them, but this should not be at the expense of people who have the substance to shape our community and culture in the years ahead.

Alex Hopkins is a writer and journalist. His blog can be found at http://alexhopkins.wordpress.com/

Film: Mr Right (homovision.tv)

COMMENT: Hedonism, HIV and the importance of talking

Alex Hopkins — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:52:41 +0000

Everyone has had the odd lost night once in a while. The type when you find yourself stumbling on to the first tube in the morning or, heaven forbid, precariously negotiating your way through the rush hour commuters. There can be something refreshingly beautiful about the experience. At their best these nights can represent a moment of epiphany.

Gay men have a perhaps not underserved reputation for hedonism. After decades of closeted persecution, the 1970s became our moment of unadulterated freedom. Shame was no longer our default mechanism, but a wasted emotion. The lost nights all merged into one in a gloriously wild celebration of sexuality. We created new ways of exploring our bodies and minds and fathomed out a defiantly different, uncompromising lifestyle – the polar opposite of the society that had condemned us for so long.

The spell was broken with AIDS. A decimated community rebuilt itself from ground zero. Men who until then could have been accused of being shallow and living only for selfish pleasure came together to form a supportive family. There were no other choices – kinship was the only key to their survival.

In an age where we have perhaps lost that need for such an obvious political struggle we have also lost that need to care, communicate and support one another. I say we have lost the need for an obvious political struggle, yet conversely it is blatantly obvious to me what we need to struggle to achieve.

The drug abuse, the unsafe sex, the rise in HIV rates and the crushing loneliness I see on London’s gay scene are perfectly obvious – frighteningly so. Do we really have to wait for yet more new HIV infections to emerge before something is done? How many more GHB overdoses do we need to hear about? Is the elimination of all of this not reason enough to fight?

Just as it was in our darkest hour in the 1980s, communication is the key to addressing these issues. People need to come together and discuss how they feel. People’s behaviour needs to be challenged – the low self esteem that leads to this behaviour must be confronted. Opportunities and forums for this in today’s gay community are few and far in between.

There is something disarmingly faceless about gay London now. The need to conform to a macho stereotype is almost stifling. Difference is often ostracised, or even worse simply ignored. Talking is not fashionable. Look at the profiles on gay ‘dating’ websites with their ubiquitous body shots. Where are the faces?

The figures who dominate these sites are, not infrequently, the ‘Vauxhall Tribe.’ They will spend all week in the gym before hitting the same weekend clubs. Even if they didn’t take so many drugs that they could not remember the weekend’s shenanigans it would make no difference, simply because there is nothing different or worthwhile to remember anyway. It’s a learned pattern of behaviour based on purely visuals – the way they flex their muscles to catch the strobes, that over practised pose in the sauna every Sunday morning.

These lost nights represent nothing new or beautiful. Meaningful interaction and conversation is often non-existent. Yet slouched against the walls of the club or sauna, the unspoken cry for attention often betrays a crushing loneliness and desperation at the inability to find the right words to express numbed feelings.

Sex and drugs have always played a part in our culture and always will. In the past, however, we used them to explore exciting, fresh dimensions of our collective psyche. There was a bold sense of being in control. We used the self discovery they offered to show the straight world that we were as good as them and ten times more innovative – and most importantly, we did this as a more unified body. That pioneering spirit has gone. What’s left is a deadened march of purposeless zombies, as stale and bleak as any Tuesday comedown.

Feelings are not particularly fashionable in modern gay life. They are not commercial. They do not sell magazine copy like the Aussie Bum and Abercrombie and Fitch models. These are the people that we are told to emulate – it is these lives that the ‘Vauxhall Tribe’ strive to adopt with the ruthless gym and drug toil. In their minds the more they stick up their noses and swallow the closer they are to this Peter Pan fairy tale version of gay life.

The images that we are taught to consume as gay men help precipitate the feelings of loneliness, isolation and the subsequent playing out of self-destructive behaviour that is swamping and threatening to obliterate today’s gay scene.

Talking is the only way that an individual can build sustainable, meaningful relationships. It is the only way that we can analyse, deconstruct and make sense of our actions. It is the only way that we can create intimacy and grasp some semblance of solace. The further we move away from the ability to hold a conversation into the impersonality of the merely visual, the further we stray from reality. Everyone needs the escapism of the odd lost night, but when it becomes our only way of interacting, we surrender to an anaesthetized universe that is ultimately as dark and companionless as the depths of any railway arch.

Alex Hopkins is a writer and journalist. His blog can be found at http://alexhopkins.wordpress.com/

GMFA: “TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR SAFER SEX”

Simon McD — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 07:43:19 +0000

This World AIDS Day, GMFA, the gay men’s health charity, will be promoting the message that all gay men, regardless of their HIV status, are responsible for safer sex, in a new postcard campaign and host of fundraising events.

Matthew Hodson, Head of Programmes at GMFA, said: “This is a simple yet important health message that we want to get across. Many HIV-negative men believe it’s up to positive men not to infect others, while many HIV-positive men believe HIV-negative men should take responsibility to protect themselves. The truth is we are all responsible for our own health as well as that of our partners.”

Unsafe sex between gay men, HIV positive and HIV negative, is behind the spread of HIV in the gay community. Both positive and negative gay men in the UK engage in high-risk sexual activity – specifically, fucking without condoms – with men whose status they do not know, or whose status they know to be different to their own.

“This means that whatever your own HIV status, you can’t rely on your partner to take responsibility for preventing the spread of HIV. Whether you want to protect your partners or protect yourself, it’s up to you to take responsibility,” adds Matthew.

Postcards featuring the message will be available in gay bars and clubs across London to coincide with a range of fundraising events in support of GMFA. Staff at participating venues will also be wearing T-shirts with the campaign slogan to further promote the message.

HOMOVISION REHAB with THE SWARMITE: ENLIGHTENMENT

Swarmite Parker — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 06:30:48 +0000

Thankfully, enlightenment is not the prime property of religion. For many BOOZE is the true sauce of light. Some years ago, I went to ClubNight – The Glory Hole @ Central Station Kings Cross with a friend, he head to toe in Prada, posing to the left and right while I entered the backroom dressed for the occasion in cargos and tight top, rarin’ to go. The room darkened on entry and as I strode forth the crowd parted like the Red Sea as if Jesus had arrived. Wow, what an entry.

Then I saw a quickening figure come toward me in slow motion who then instantly projected vomit all over me. Then I knew why the sea had parted. Seconds stood still. I walked outside stunned to find Miss Prada more astonished than I – because not only was I in shock but totally unaware of what I looked like. I went to the washroom and took off the top, rinsing it in cold water as cottagers looked over their right shoulder in amazement. Then who should come in but “The Sicky” and he looked at me as if to say ” why don’t you wash clothes at home like everyone else “. Then I got ENLIGHTENED, I could have been anybody in the way of his immediate desire to chuck – he’s in blackout.

Blackout is when you don’t recall events during and after a skinful. Many gayers call this a mark of a good night out, LOL, but it’s not funny if during this blackout you lose phones, wallets, keys or can’t remember where the car is parked. Bruises, torn shirts and bloodstains make no sense next morning, as you gingerly ask around for clues. The Sickie’s reaction to my face brought floods of memories of my own drinking years before I was deemed ” a heavy drinker, someone “who enjoys a drink”, or labeled alcoholic. I had been there.

Because I was sober that night, and had been for over a decade or two, my reaction was not one of anger, attack or darkness. My first thought was pragmatic – what do I do now? . . . Miss Prada went all codependent on me, feeling my pain etc but stopped at offering a Prada hankie to wipe my brow. Standards. Quick as a flash, I said ” I’m professional darling, I’m not gonna let some drunk spoil my evening, I’ll go home, shower, change and come back. I retained my cloak ticket (cloakies made conversation in those days and held my ticket open, so did the door whore). During the 12 min walk home, then back to the club refreshed, I thought of all the times I had been in a state like Sickie and felt huge compassion for his plight. I had discovered from experience that recovering from addiction means a continuous quest for enlightenment in the form of lightening up including not taking things personally. If I had been drinking that night I dare not think of of the consequences of my reaction. BOOZE is the forgotten drug. Maybe not forgotten on late night police telly in Newcastle but certainly forgotten by gayers who drink more, socialise more and have more disposable income to piss up a wall. A few lines of coke after the sorbet seem tame by comparison.

Mind you when people suggested I cut down my drinking I told them to piss off so I wont play the same game here but ENLIGHTENMENT also means awareness and it’s this level that I suggest you judge. Alcohol being a depressant, kicks you in the arse at some point and the speed of a gayers timetable now means double damage over a decade of drinking. Does anyone go out without a drink anymore, or not return from work with bottles clanking in a Tesco bag to de-stress? Certainly socialising without alcohol IS a bummer but think of those who don’t like alcohol or the taste of it (hard to believe I know), they manage as I do to lead a full social life. Living without booze is not like living with no legs and the bonus comes past 50 when you look naturally 10 years younger. Trust me. If you or someone you know has an alcohol problem then I can tell you alcohol is NOT the problem, living WITHOUT ALCOHOL is the problem because you are faced with your own raw fears, insecurities and low esteem.

Functioning alcohol dependents can go on for years with a red face and skin like a road map, trudging from fuel stop to fuel stop, so if you wonder where old gayers go many end up at the Wine Shop, snarling at the world, their partners and themselves in blackout rage, pissing in the wardrobe coz they think they are in the bathroom or vomiting at will when the mood takes. Learning to cut down now in your 20’s & 30’s will save a lot of soul searching and apologies later, but the reality is that if you are a piss head the lash will take you down a peg or two in lost respect, relationships and work opportunities eventually. The other issue is that drunks attract drunks, chem lovers will always find another and relationships with either are not made in heaven. The behaviour of a heavy alcohol or drug user will affect up to 20 people around them so the answer is to gain enlightenment through truth, honesty and action. Oh! . . and next time take a small torch (and a change of clothes) into the backroom. LOL.

If you need help for yourself around booze checkout http://www.theswarmite.com and click BOOZE CHECK or for support links around URBAN ADDICTIONS http://www.theswarmite.com/clublands-therapist/urban-addictions

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